Like something out of The Far Side, pedestrians in Maryland were recently startled to see a trio of cows (ok, not real cows, but humans in cow suits) leap from a van and begin accosting passersby, handing out cowbells and other swag that seemed to be promoting a Cow Revolution website, www.bovineunite.com. If you haven’t visited this site yet, you need to go there. Now.
Prepare yourself for the upcoming cow revolution. Seems our bovine friends have had quite enough of our milking them for all they’re worth, among other indignities. But they’re not just mad, they’re planning on getting even, and claiming their right to greener pastures in the process. Bovine Unite includes links to a cow blog, cow forum, and numerous media files including videos of cows pumping iron and the Bovine National Anthem. All of this is in preparation for “C-Day” on May 5th, when their nefarious bovine plan will go into effect.
Speculation abounds, but whoever’s behind all this had done a good job hiding their tracks. Web denizens are pointing to everyone from Chick-Fil-A to PETA, but the fact that events seem to be localized solely to Maryland seem to indicate otherwise.
So, keep a close eye on any cows that live near you, and be sure to stop by www.bovineunite.com on May 5th and tune in to the Cow News Networks between 8:45 and 9:00 PM (yeah, no timezone) for “further instructions.” We biped milkers are going to have to stick together to make it through this.
No, not an ARG. But pretty dang funny.
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